Feeling is a choice; no one but you are responsible for your choices; when you feel low and bad about something, it is a choice your brain has made;
you can’t change people, but you can change your choices!
Table of Contents
The Perception of Yourself vs. the Real Awareness
No external stimuli or cognition gets processed without a layer called the thought layer. That is our subconscious, the neural network of our brain. The thought layer or the layer that finds the meaning of the events and tries to organize the information in our brain is autonomous.
When you think about yourself, or when you try to experience yourself, it is your awareness. The awareness about yourself is part of your aware brain. An aware brain is one that decodes the physiological state of the body(chemical and electrical) and synthesizes neurochemicals such as dopamine and norepinephrine. The brain can sense the change in the neurohormones, and this change act as your awareness about yourself.
However the thought layer, or the core processing layer of the brain produces no neurochemicals, and therefore you are not aware of the ways the neurons are organizing or disorganizing to create meaning.
So your thought layer is like the operating system in the computer and your awareness about yourself is like the application.
While reading this post, did you think how much of processing of hardware and software is going on in the background?
Therefore, you think that your feelings(experienced change of state of the neurochemicals after the measurement of the physiological state of the body) are an outcome of your cognition(final app)
Your perception about feelings= (External world<=>You)=>Cognition=>FeelingsBut, in Reality
External World<=Thought Layer(TL)->Cognition->You->Emotion
(Pay close attention to arrows)In a nutshell, your feelings and your awareness about yourself are largely derived from the processing in your thought layer. A much heavier amount of energy is consumed by the hardware and operating system of a mobile and computer device than the application programs and apps such as Google Chrome.
Demo of What People Says
Now open the following two boxes one by one, with ten seconds gap and consume the text.
This is how you react! (open the box)
You are such a big loser!
But !(open the box again)
That is not what you are, that is what you will say in your mind whomsoever bullies you! Because you are Awesome.
You see, there is a subconscious TL that perceives data and regulates your feelings, while you feel it is you. The interesting part is that “feeling bad” is attributed to negative components in TL. The reason you felt odd and bad immidiately after you opened the first box is because your brain connected your negative past experinces fast and generated a feeling.
And the reason, even after opening the second box, which is written to give you good feelings, you did not feel that good. Did you?
The reason being that TL always give priorities to threats. Anyone saying you anything negative targets your inner insecurities and therefore you become negative. At this stage, your brain fills your brain with adranaline hormone, which is an anger hormone. It takes atleast 2-5 hours for adranaline to be absorbed by the body.
Because adranaline reacts fast, you were already negative when you opened the second box. The second box could give you the positive feelings, but it couldnt. Because even though Dopamine was released, due to the already filled adranaline you did not feel anything.
Now open this third box below
Open this box now, there is one more surprise for you.
You see, you hesitated to open this box. You were skeptical and did not want to open this box. That is fear(false evidence appearing true). That means there was no threat in opening the boxy, but your brain apprehended, what if there is a bad feeling waiting inside?
Once your brain processes the possibility of a negative feelings, it induces fear in you, and you become skeptical and always start with the negative thinking.
Therapeutics of What People Says
The good news is that we can control our thoughts, cognition, and thus emotions.
Dedicate 10 minutes for yourself in the morning(if you can’t, you don’t have a life anyways).
1. GRATITUDE:- Think about one good memory of three people from your life, and thank them for this. This includes even people whom you dislike, people from childhood.
2. SELF-LOVE:- Think three great things that are going on with your life now(even if it is messy).
3. THOUGHT-CUTTING:- Once you get a cycle of negative thoughts, it needs focus and lot of energy. Cut it by saying “these are just thoughts and thoughts have no significance” or counting 10-1 in inverse order.
Reprogram your thought layer with Positive Reinforcement and Negative Filter.
Your Positive Feelings Now
Now you must be feeling much better. That is because this article explained your aware brain about what is the nature of the activity that is going on in the background. This article for you is like learning operating systems before learning to code. If you know the operating system, and kernels, you will know where to use processes, threads, parallelism, loop and so on.
Whenever you will feel bad about what people have said you, your aware brain will remember this post and the effect will be much less.
If you follow this for a month, you will be surprised by the result.
Difference between the Reaction of Men and Women in WPS
This is particularly a very effective strategy to have for women. Women are more emotionally active than men(in general) and have strong limbic brain for emotional processing.
They are often advised by everyone and judged. This leads to a very strong thought layer, which they find beyond their control. TL reprogramming helps cut the circuit between TL and WPS
For men, this becomes very effective mostly when he is in stress, relationship stress in particular. In those times, for men, the cognition layer gets active that pulls negative thoughts.
In either case, Positive Reinforcement and Negative Filter works like charm.
Conclusion
Take control of your subconscious thoughts. It will look silly, again because your thought will process this information through a negative lens and feel how come something as silly as this can help. You may also ask, why should I feel good, when there is nothing to feel good about.
In reality, after any negative event there is a positive outcome you are hoping for. Uncluttered thought layer helps you to reach there better.
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