What is a relationship? What is the difference between a relationship and togetherness? What purpose does a relationship serve? What are the core rules in a relationship? Why modern relationships are fragile?
Table of Contents
A. Relationship
A Relationship is a set of rules that defines the energy exchange between two individuals in order to cumulatively meet three biological needs Survive, Thrive, and Reproduce.
A relationship is not togetherness.
Example of Togetherness between Tomato, Chilli and Potato
you go to a bazaar, get some tomato, potato and chilli and onion in a bag. There is no relationship between the chilli, tomato, potato, and onion. They are together.
Example of a Relationship between Tomato, Chilli and Potato by Applying a Rule
1. Heat up a pan in gas.
2. Put oil.
3. Put chopped onions.
4. Add little salt and turmeric,
5. Fry sliced potatoes till they become brown-red.
6. Put chopped tomatoes, steer.
7. Mix them well, and add chopped chilli.
8. Lower the heat, cover the pan, and after 15 minutes you will have a relationship of all of them called Potato curry.
Try to think of this as an altered rule such as putting chilli in a pan, then adding tomato, and lastly, adding oil!!
Even though the individual entities of Tomato, Chilli, and Potato form a relationship of potato curry in the above example, they are not live objects(humans or animals), but the relationship still serves their survival, thriving, and reproduction, because when the curry is made, it is consumed, and the seeds are either thrown to soil or go back to soil through fecal matter, which then enables a germination and plant.
However, if they were kept as is, and not cooked, there would be chances of the vegetables catching fungus, in which case there would be no chance of germination, as they would be disposed of.
B. Key Components of A Relationship
- Individuality
- Boundary
- Interdependency
- Laws
- Purpose.
- Exchange
For every relationship, we create a persona. That persona is governed by the rule, and defined by purpose.
Example of Persona
Mother kisses a son on the head, not the lips. Son kisses mother on chicks. Son touches father’s feet, not a collar, and father places his hands on son’s head, not wallet.
C. Example of Relationship
a. Mother and Infant Child
i) Child gives reproduction validation.
ii) Growth of the child validates thriving.
iii) Mother feeds the child(mother fulfils survival needs)
iv) Mother gives feelings(Impulse+Energy)(thrive)
The infant child can’t breathe feed or safeguard the mother, and the mother can’t give reproductive validation to the child.
D. Key Behavioral Shift
1. People have eaten Pizza and burgers and fast food so much, they lost their taste buds. So “Macher jhol”(Fish Curry) doesn’t have varieties like Black Cumin curry, Mustered Fish, Curd Fish, or Paste Onion dish, but lots of onions, ginger, garlic, jeera, mustered everything!!
2. Brain works only one way. So people have started considering that the only food is Veg Kadai(we have a vegan movement now!!!) where add all vegetables, all spices. No confusion.
3. Because the brain works only in one way, people have started considering all relationships to be the same, everyone is the same.
4. Why keep all daals in separate boundaries(packets)? add mung, masoor, toor, and chana together and make one daal. No boundary, no confusion.
E. Some Healthy Mind Examples
1. You get Ill, you discuss it with a doctor.
2. Your car breaks down, and you have a relationship with a car mechanic.
3. Your kitchen sink is clogged, you have a relationship with a plumber.
Now consider leaving your 50L car to an FRCS doctor, your digestive tract to a plumber, and your kitchen sink to a car mechanic.
F. Mixed Veg Kadai Korma Relationship Examples
A mixed veg kadai korma is a typical modern dish that is made by mixing every vegetable possible and adding every spice imaginable. This eliminates the need of carefully crafting a dish.
As more and more people are eating mixed veg, where there is no need for a distinction of taste of the vegetable or the spices, the relationships are being replaced by mixed togetherness. No rules are applied to togetherness. There is just living together without any rules or interdependency. No different personas are maintained. And such relationships serve no other purpose other than the facade of the relationship.
Some of the common examples are:
1. Discuss your sex life with your father.
2. Discuss the job with the mother.
3. Discuss mother with boss.
4. Parents are friends.
5. Girlfriend is mother.
F. Conclusion
1. Discuss office and jobs with parents, and then give expert feedback and opinions on career(Adult child😂)
2. Mother teaching son how to keep relationship with bahu!
3. Father-in-law thinks daughter-in-law is the daughter.
4. Boyfriends kiss girls on their hands and chicks(buy a chicken and kiss the chicken instead).
5. Girls discussing her family life with her parents(This has to get into human history as a royal screw).
6. Father and son keeping each other’s hands on each other’s shoulders(and fathers are supposed to teach boundaries).
7. Go to date with your friend(If you are a hostelite girl and taking your roommate to date, she is the one to marry your boyfriend🙊 statistics)
8. Discuss office challenges and politics with your wife.
It’s a Mixed Veg Kadai Korma anyways, and in the future, we will see “mixed veg non-veg kadai egg chicken mutton fish kadai tawa curry khichdi”
If you have no girlfriend, don’t bother investing time in finding one at the age of 25, chat 2 hours daily with your mother for feelings ok? Of course, everyone loves BigBoss these days, but by letting people peak through your personal and family life’s hole, you don’t win a 50L check.
