Table of Contents
A. Strategy I: Emotional boundary
Separate from the parent first, and advise them to stay out of your personal life and divorce. Parents are old, feelings-driven. You don’t win wars with silly feelings, you win wars with strategies and smartness.
B. Strategy II: Choose Your Battle: Don’t fight for child custody
i) Child up to the age of 13, belongs to mothers. Mother and child are entangled psychologically in what is called Primary narcissism. They are just two bodies, one brain.
ii) If the mother hates you, and she does, and that’s why you are in a divorce battle, then the child will hate you too. That is because the mother will pour all her venom into the child.
iii) Even when you meet the child, if the child is happy with you, he/she has to pretend not to be happy going back home, because if he/she doesn’t he/she will be poured more venom on. Children learn fast.
iv) Even when you don’t meet the child, she will continue to pour venom into the child. Like the mother, the child is feelings driven. Feelings are changes in hormones. The child will soon be insensitive to tantrums.
v) (But if you meet the child often and make the child happy, the venom will cause significant emotional damage to the child, due to a change of feelings).
iv) Father’s duty is to provide and protect. You do not want to stand before a bunch of losers in the family court and say anything that disrespects your child’s mother(because remember the child and mother are simply two bodies and one soul).
v) You don’t want to say anything negative about your wife(or ex-wife) in court(even the aggression or other instances). Her behavior was her choice, protecting your child’s mother is your duty.
vi) As a provider, invest your time, money, and energy to grow in your life and career and provide for your child. That is your child, no court, no “people” no one should dictate or tell you how much you should provide.
vii) Child is a perceived weakness of men. That is a soft spot that will always be targeted. Appear insensitive, and uninterested in the child. This will screw the brain of you know whom.
C. Strategy III: Phyrric Victory: Make your (ex) Wife Win
i) A Pyrrhic victory is referred to as a victory that comes at such a cost that the victory appears as the loss of life.
ii) You focus on your economic, career, professional, and social growth. When the court calls, visits, and keeps silent.
(Remember India gave away part of Kasmir in Tashkent Treaty even after winning the 66′ war hands down. It satisfied Pakistan’s ego, and they foresaw ruling India through the same insurgency theatrics. Pakistan remained busy keeping a low productive land).
iii) Let the cases drag for even 10 years if that’s what she wants. She loses her finance, sleep, peace, youth, and emotions. You get a life, she gets her ego. Finally, crush that with her own envy of your happiness and growth in life.
Don’t b**ch around, be a man, enjoy the battle, use other’s stupidity for your rise.
D. Conclusion
If you are to aim, aim to win the world, to rise in life. You are not born to take care of the silly feelings of others. You create such immense values, that people want to be in your life for those values.
Stop paying heed to nonsense like “society, log kya kahenge.” All those people do nothing for the society. You provide employment, become valuable to society, provide teaching, mentor youth, and contribute to improving society’s infrastructure and the same people will lick your boot.
It is India’s time. You have to ride that tide. Build an empire for your child, and the same mother will send her child to become the king and queen.
Life is short, energy and resources are limited, and time is for growth. Just grow. Invest money in growth and business, not on silly courts. Don’t win a Phyrric battle.
Be unapologetically ruthless and selfish about your growth. Ego is too small a gain to stake everything in war. Ask America!
Set a boundary and ask your parents and relatives to mind their own life and business, while you grow. A man’s life is not worth wasting in explaining others.
You build muscle, money, and business, travel the world, drive posh cars, and compete with Elon Musk if you must compete! Be a man, not a chump.
